your words

"reminiscing about the past
i will do it alone
you don't need to do that
you are supposed to be hopelessly
cheerful and sturdy
are you trying to drum up pity?

a hundred times a day
thausand of times
i resent it and resent it even more
why did i meet you
why did it have to be you
you make me resent and blame myself
you are someone who make me regret
you are like nightmare that i dont want to remember

didn't i tell you go back to the time
you didn't know me
go back and meet a man that better than me
and live happy life everyday
forget a punk like me and live happily
please live that way!"

when u said those words outloud
you look heartless and cruel
i want to hate you for the rest of my life

but why?
tell me why your eyes says differently
pitiful
that what it says

p/s: in love with you!

=)

one of the biggest flattery is
knowing that just by being your normal silly self
you made someone fall in love with you

>..<

memory makes me wonder ^^

my ate michiko sent me a text just now..

"hey kawan! hargai lah mereka yang menyayangi mu.. jangan menyesal seperti aku"

that advice made me cry so much.. lately i've been feeling lost.. i wonder why? hmm bcause my gem gem not here? or my best chingu not here? or i'm missing someone soo much? argh molla! i really hate this feeling.. i feel uneasy and sensitive.. yeah! if something doesnt happen the way i want.. i cried so much..

like that text.. the word menyesal make me.. hmmm remember someone.. the text is refering to mr daim.. hmm choc daim.. but the word menyesal made me though about somebody else.. hmm who? i think i love him so much.. and that the reason why i hurt so much.. the day we spent together is something that i treasure so much! and the second that he hurt me.. i will never forget.. he meant a lot for me..

because of that second i take almost a month to forgive him.. that the other second come.. and another second.. i think only 3 second.. it takes me 2 years to forgive and not to forget.. if people say it feel like a knife stabbed in ur heart.. for me its not.. it feel like a broken glass is scratch all over my heart.. and the broken glass remain there.. then the glass will never leave my heart.. hmm to make sure that i didnt forget it..

that what i thought.. tehee.. now we become best friend.. and my feelings? sometimes i forget i was being hurt by him.. and now forget is something i need? nooo! he was hurt by me too.. so we kinda competing with each other.. hey darl i hope u have a beautiful relationship with her.. hey no matter how busy u arewith ur own life.. i know i am in ur heart.. why i'm so sure? because i were there before and it gonna remain there foerever.. it my promise.. remember? tehee<3

p/s; ate daim is someone that loves me so much but he is control maniac! urgh freaky?! my second bff i write my name there with my own blood so it will never erased by anybody except me.. freaky? theat ur punishment for hurting me last 4years!! <3

hopes

hmm missing my lil sis so damn much.. that what i can conclude now.. my life is kinda messy right now.. i wake up late and awake till late night.. one sentence please! life is soo great to be regret and enjoy it babe! yeah!

aaarrggghhh!! wahai semangat datanglah kepadaku!! aku amat memerlukan kamu saat ini.. ^^

[110626] HD | 2PM - Like A Movie + Hands Up [Inkigayo Comeback Special S...

[M/V] 2PM "HANDS UP" from HANDS UP

new song,, new style and new beat!! but the same group!!

who is that? it 2PM!!
yeah they back with their new album.. the second album..
and i fall in love again and again!!

i love the music
i love the outfit
i love them so much!
so guys let party!!
put ur hands up!!

their comeback is this friday (cant wait to see their lives).. 24 june 2011.. and it beacome more special because it nichkhun birthday!! saengil chukahae oppa and good luck 2pm oppa!! fighthing!^^

deal or no deal

it's hard to compete with your guy first love right? especially the really really good one.. well something like wow awesome! huh! ^^

for me it not that hard.. hehe.. sounds like i used to deal with it? haha.. no la.. the thing that makes it harder is.. urself! why urself?

well u the one that doesnt belive in him.. doesnt believe in urself.. yeah it true it hard to believe in guys loyalty.. somehow u the one with him right now not 'she' that first love.. eventhough she always reminds u about how great their first love..

huh?! like i care.. but it gonna be bad also if u pretend that u okay.. because ur relationship will never okayh! so have a talk with him.. ask him from heart to heart.. nice idea? of course! tehee..

well i never dealt with this first love thing guys.. but i had been someone first love.. am i proud? well yeah of course!! how i cant? because he also my first love.. u know something like butterflies in ur stomach.. hee.. i'm not going to tell about him today.. maybe tomorow.. or the next day.. ^^

girls when u have something to dealt with ur boys.. first thing first is calming urself.. no calm no talk.. is just gonna be a cat fight or maybe third world war.. who know? ^^ second thing is let learn being a good listner of explanation.. then being rational in thinking.. easy? not so easy babe.. believes me.. ^^

past and future

u must let go the past
so that the future can comes into it place

really? then if u cant then the future is not a future? it not going to become a good future maybe? or ur life is in danger? ^^

is not easy to let go the past.. well it is easy when u are saying it.. but to be done.. hmm not that easy.. maybe it gonna to hurt u and people around u..

past can be happy and sad.. if it sad we need to let it go? if happy not? how about that happy moment is something that gonna hurt someone else?

hmm life is not easy.. but living is so much fun and amazing to let it past.. ^^

matrik?

finally i'm here.. well again.. after a few weeks gone.. hee.. just need time to settle down my last day at cfs iium.. i think that the best ever path that i choose? hee.. what up guys? having fun during the semester break? me? huh look like it gonna be a bit boring..

why? and why? well i supposed to have fun this break with my luvly gem gem.. having a cup of cofee? (oh classy! ).. or maybe dancing OH! by snsd ( siusly it is amazingly alot easier than i thought).. but it turns out NOT! my luvly lil is now gone tooo? i think a bit far from me.. because i was forced not to visit her..

then again.. why and why? hee.. the big head of the instituition that she belong to right now strictly prohibited us( the family member ) to visit her.. well where is the instituition?

kolej matrikulasi melaka.. at first when i know she got there.. woah! i love it.. it gonna be awesome! yeah and it turns out fascinating in her life now.. u know melaka is a big state now.. so i thought when she got there.. i'll be visiting her right? so it maybe turns out into a vacation? wow! who knows? tehee..

act the important thing is i'm proud of her.. well not just because this reason.. but because who she is.. why did i say this? during my time ( ceh start to talk like u so much older? ) when i heard the word matrikulasi.. wow! sound like awesome and harsh.. well i mean awesome in other way of saying like 'awesome' ( with hands).. tehee.. dont u feel the same way? for me matrik sound hard and no fun? yeah that what i feel.. thank God iium choose me as one of their student.. ^^ i proud that she choose something that she never thought.. and how hardworking she is to get it..

it because at first she doesnt got any offer to further her study.. she cried.. a lot actually.. well eventhough she doesnt tell me.. i know her feeling very very well.. i've been through exactly the same thing.. u know when everybody says.. 'u deserve this because u dont study'.. HAHA! like u know me better? huh! so she stand up for what she believes.. which is second chance? then there she is.. at the matrik.. i'm proud of u babe!

p/s: babe when u home i'm going to cook something special for u and fighting.. and well if there any grammar mistake.. can u help me? hee.. ( band 3)